When Multitasking Goes Wrong.

Disclaimer: No animals or children where harmed during the happening of this story or in the reenactment. Nor is this posting an admission that this event truly happening.

When Multitasking Goes Awry.

Starring:

Zoe Maddison as Herself
Stuntman Mr. Dinosaur as Distressed Zoe Maddison
Mr. Phone as The Phone
Dad as The Voice on the Phone
Mom as The Narrator

The Scene:

A living room with a couch and ottoman next to each other.

It was a semi dark and stormy day. Like any other given afternoon, Zoe and I were laying on the couch feeding and having a grand ole time. Then out of nowhere the phone rings sending the baby's startle reflex into high gear. Her limbs were suddenly stiff and flailing about. Barely avoiding a black eye I reach for the phone and answer it. But it was just dad saying he was back from dinner and now at the hotel. We talk on the phone about the day's happening and blah blah blah. Then dad says he needs to put me on hold for a few minutes. Cue the multitasking. Thinking I will have enough time to make another phone call and ask a question dad wants the answer to I put down the first phone and proceed to the dining room. Leaving a crying Zoe on the couch and the phone on the ottoman.

Thinking nothing of the fact I am 15 feet away from the future shenanigans, I sit down at the table and start talking away. Vehemently writing down the details dad wants to know, I suddenly feel this pulling sensation in the back of my mind. My attention slowly turns to what is no longer occurring. A sound that is no longer there is now accompanied by a new sound. What is that absent sound? And what is that new sound I ask myself. I realize this is not a new sound per say but a voice saying "Hello! Hello! Hello!!!!!" Is there someone in my house? Is there someone at my door? Nope. I finally recognize the voice as dad's voice through the phone. But why does it sound so strange? I turn around and take a few steps back to the living room and my eyes open wider than ever before. If Zoe didn't have a diaper on, I would have the most perfect view of her derriere ever! And it would have been so beautiful in any other situation. But this is not any other situation. To my surprise she has apparently learned the new skill of rolling over and over. She has rolled herself from the couch onto the strategically-placed-by-paranoid-mom ottoman. Her potentially cute little booty is propped up in the air by her knees because her little head, shoulders, and her arms are now hanging over the edge of the ottoman.




Her little legs are moving trying to help out of her newly acquired dangerous position. But to no avail to the positive side of this situation but rather she is only moving herself further over the edge.



That is when super-save-the-day-mom steps in. Sometimes when you create a situation you have to remedy it. I swoop in lift her little heavy-as-a-ton-of-bricks body out of emanate danger and place her right back where she rolled from. Hind sight is apparently not 20/20 when so close to the event you should be avoiding again. I then hear a very clear as day "Hello!". I look down to see that Zoe had rolled over onto the phone therefore covering it and making dad sound funny. I yell into his phone "Hold on!" and continue on with my other phone call having that lady none the wiser of the just occurring haphazard careless parenting of me, I mean of that fictional mom lady.

Just occuring side thought: AHHHHHHH!!!! I'm now a "mom lady"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHH!!!!!

Zoe and Mr. Dino after the making of this story.

-